Engineer Job






judges can’t really be expected to move you to the front of the line just because you have to go to work. And if someone is charged with an imprisonable offense, the judge isn’t rushing because he probably knows (although the employee apparently doesn’t) that when an employee posts bail, their company usually posts also – but they’re not posting bail, they’re posting a want ad to find another employee.

Hey, it could happen. In fact, even in one of the country’s most cosmopolitan cities, the New York City Parks Department reported that in just six years, Staten Island’s white-tail deer population increased from 24 to 793. That’s a 3,304 percent increase! In just six years! And State Farm predicts that every year, 1 out of every 169 drivers will hit a deer, resulting in $3,900 worth of vehicle damage. So this is a public service announcement that you should also stop if you see a herd of deer. Granted, they’re more likely to run across the road than to just roam through the town’s streets like an angry mob, but you never know . . . 

But presumably, the employee woke up, right? And then remembered that it was a dream, right? If you dream someone is chasing you, do you wake up and start running? If you dream you’re back in high school, do you wake up and go to your high school – 20 years later? Of course not. You may dream that you won a Grammy, but then you wake up and remember that you can’t sing or play a musical instrument. Or, you may dream that you’re married to Beyonce or David Beckham, but then you wake up, roll over, look at Edith, Archie (or fill in your spouse’s name), and immediately you realize that you were dreaming. Dreaming that you got fired is no different. Well, maybe it is because this is one dream that may actually come true. 
Well at least they didn’t steal the whole car. It’s awfully hard to believe that someone would steal an entire trunk. How much time does it take to remove a trunk, and wouldn’t someone – or everyone – hear the thief? And why on earth would anyone steal a car trunk? This may sound like the most outrageous excuse on the list, BUT the employee had the photo to prove it!