Rajnikant

Once Death had ‘near Rajnikant experience’! When GOD is shocked He exclaims “Oh my Rajnikaant!” Once, Rajnikant was having a cup of tea. Suddenly, in his typical style he cut the tea into half. Since then, we know our popular cutting chai Once Dinosaurs borrowed money from Rajnikant and refused to pay him back... That was the last time anyone saw Dinosaurs. One night, a ghost was consoling another, "Don't worry, I told you it's all in your mind... There is nothing like Rajnikant". Girl : Rajnikanth Se Boli. Girl: Ek Chutki Sindoor Ki Keemat, Tum Kya Jaano ? Rajnikanth: 0.00078924576 Rs. Per Gram When you search Rajini in Google, what does Google say? "I'm Feeling Lucky”! How does Rajni do Shirshasan? He simply turns the world upside down. This message has been sent by Rajnikanth in the interest of humanity. "Stop making jokes on me otherwise I will delete your FORWARD option" DHOOM-3 Scene: John, Hritik, Aamir on BIKE with speed of 2000km/hr. And suddenly, Rajnikanth overtakes them with Bicycle And says .. .. .. “Save Fuel Use cycle" Once Rajnikant was on the hot seat of KBC.... And the computer needed lifeline to choose the question. Mind it! Q: Why does rajnikanth wear sunglasses? A: To protect the sun from his eyes! Gabbar: Kitne Admi the? Kaliya: Sarkar 1 Gabbar :Aur tum? Kaliya: 100 Gabbar: fir b wapas aa gaye woh b khali hath,kaun tha woh? Kaliya: RAJNI... Gabbar: Oops! Sorry my mistake Chai wai pe bula lete hai sir ko... Contrary to popular belief, Rajnikant cannot fly. He just jumps and chooses when to come down. Once Rajnikanth entered bigg boss…The next day announcement was made… Rajnikanth chahte hai ki bigg boss confession room me aye... When Rajnikanth get angry at the Sun, it hides behind the moon… that phenomenon is called Solar eclipse. Rajnikant runs until the treadmill gets tired Some magicans can walk on water, Rajnikant can swim through land Rajnikant is lovin’ it! – Macdonald’s new tagline When Pope walks with Rajanikanth, People ask “Who is that guy in robe?” Whenever Rajnikanth makes an error, it’s an invention. In Rajnikanth’s wedding, the fire took the saath phere of Rajnikanth and his wife Rajnikanth can cure cancer with his first aid box Gabbar singh forgets his dialogues when he sees Rajnikanth Rajini can eat dosa with chop sticks Once Rajnikant was caught on the highway for over speeding… while walking… The Great Wall of China was originally created to keep Rajnikant out. It failed miserably If Rajnikant gets into a car accident (yeah right) His car will need some airbags to protect it from him. The only thing that runs faster and longer than Rajnikanth are his films. When Rajnikanth walks on road, he actually does not walk, the road walks under him.... An e-mail was sent from pune to mumbai and Rajnikanth stopped it in lonavala. Once a cobra bit Rajinikanth’ leg, after five days of excruciating pain, the cobra died. Rajanikanth makes onions cry. The new symbol for the Rupee is actually Rajnikanth’s Signature. The ice age ended when Rajnikant lost his cool. Rajinikanth doesn’t wear a watch. He decides what time it is. Rajnikant had died 20 yrs ago...death hasn't built up the courage to tell him yet. Why did Superman and Batman visit Rajnikant? Because it was Teachers Day! When Rajnikant switches on his AC without closing the door, winter starts in India. Behind every successful man, there is a woman. Behind every dead man, there is Rajanikanth. Rajnikanth doesn’t answer nature’s call nature answers Rajnikanth’s call!! Bill Gates lives in constant fear that Rajanikanth’s PC will crash. People update status via BlackBerry, iPhone, iPad, etc.Rajinikanth updates status via Calculator Rajnikant sneezed only once in his entire life. That was when the tsunami hit. Rajinikanth doesn’t move at the speed of light. Light moves at the speed of Rajinikanth. Rajnikanth can produce fire by rubbing 2 ice cubes Rajinikanth is a champion in the game “Hide n’ seek”, as no one can hide from Rajinikanth. Once Rajnikant forgot his toys near Mumbai; that place is now known as Essel World. Rajinikanth has already been to Mars, that’s why there are no signs of life there. Rajinikanth never wet his bed as a child. The bed wet itself in fear. When Rajinikant croses the Road, the cars have to look left and right before moving. Rajinikanth killed the Dead Sea. Rajinikanth once kicked a horse in the chin. Its descendants are today called giraffes Rajinikanth can play the violin with a piano Rajnikanth once wrote a cheque, the bank bounced! Rajnikant got his driver's license at the age of 16 seconds. Ghosts are actually caused by Rajanikanth killing people faster than Death can process them. Rajinikanth once ordered a plate of idli in McDonald’s, and got it. Rajinikanth kills Harry Potter in the eighth book. Initially, Superman couldn't fly. Then he met Rajnikant. You see, fear gives you wings!!! Rajinikanth has already been to Mars, that’s why there are no signs of LIfe on it When Rajnikant logs on to facebook.com, facebook updates its status message! Rajni once killed 20 men just by saying "BANG" Rajinikanth knows Victoria’s secret. Rajinikanth can divide by zero. Rajinikanth has counted to infinity, twice. When Rajinikanth gives you the finger, he's telling you how many seconds you have left to live. “Rajnikanth doesn’t breathe…air comes to hide in his lungs” One day Rajani thought to play cricket in monsoon and rain stopped due to play…. Rajnikant’s house has no doors, only walls that he walks through. Rajnikant grinds his coffee with his teeth and boils the water with his own rage. Rajnikant once ate an entire bottle of sleeping pills, they just made him blink. Where there is a will, there’s a way. Where there is Rajnikant, there is no other way!! Rajanikanth can build a snowman…. out of rain. Rajinikanth killed Spiderman using Baygon Anti Bug Spray. One day Rajnikant bunked school. Since then it is known as Sunday. Rajanikanth can drown a fish. Rajinikant is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head. MIND IT...!!! Happy Kite Festival!! One DAY, naasa scientists found something is flying in mars. They become happy and shouted – ‘life on mars, life on mars’ Later they found That . . …. . . rajnikant was flying a kite on mars from earth…………….. What is ufo??? Someday Rajnikanth got angry with her mother and threw away her dinner set Today people refer to them as flying saucer n ufo. Q-which liquid turns solid on heating? All scientists failed but rajnikanth did… Q-which liquid turns solid on heating? Ans-DOSA… Rajnikant’s ammunition Rajnikant’s ammunition suddenly got over and a villain came in front of him and instantly died because, . . Rajnikant shouted “DHISHKYAAOON” I m kanth, rajnikanth Once James bond shoot a person and said I’m bond, James bond. Climax: But the person catches the bullet and throws at bond & bond dies The person says “I m kanth, rajnikanth” Headline of Today Headline of Today... Ek train cycle ki chapet main ayi... Train main sawar sbhi log mare gaye... . . . News: Cycle driver “RAJNIKANT” Farrar :-) Ek train cycle ki chapet main ayi... Train main sawar sbhi log mare gaye... . . . News: Cycle driver “RAJNIKANT” Farrar Actual reason of tsunami Finally scientists get success in finding actual reason of tsunami . . . Rajnikant was swimming in the ocean that day! Rajnikanth went to world cooking championship Rajnikanth went to world cooking championship Of course rajni won. But Guess What did he make in final??? Lal mirchi ki meethi kheer. Rajni rocks…!!! Rajani had performed “SUN WALK” The death of Micheal jackson is revealed . . . The day before he died He saw Rajanikanths Dance And he got shocked . . . Because rajani had performed “SUN WALK” When Rajinikanth does push-ups When Rajinikanth does push-ups, he isn’t lifting himself up. He is pushing the earth down. har baar RAJNIKANTH thodi hoga…. Who can stop fifty cars with one hand? . . . . . . Trafic police. Kya yaar, har baar RAJNIKANTH thodi hoga…. Rajni can’t....’!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Rajnikant is thinking of changing his name to ‘Rajnikan’ . . . Because. . He understands that there really isn’t anything like ‘Rajni can’t....’!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Rajnikant & February Rajnikant was born on 30 February . . . Since then February decided not to give this day to anybody else. Mind It. RajniKanth’s Titenic Remake of TITANIC, Rajnikant is the hero. But climax changed. At the end Rajnikant survived through Pacific Ocean: ‘Girl friend in one hand and Titanic in the other hand’. Ship was saved with a BAMBOO STICK. Apple logo & rajnikant Now…. Its official….. . . . The missing piece of Apple’s Logo was eaten by. Mr. Rajnikant!! MIND IT…!!! Rajni and NASA Just like Match Stick Rajnikanth throws Saucer after drinking tea – silly NASA call it UFO Rajni will play in twitter Rajnikanth’s Next movie is called Twitter . . . . . He plays 140 Characters in It.!! Rajnikanth and recession What was the cause of recession in 2008? . . . Rajnikant lost his wallet!!!! Rajni’s Diwali Breaking News NASA closed. . . . Rajnikant bought all the rockets for diwali…. Happpy Diwali!!! Rajnikanth's Chess This can't be beaten!! Yesterday Rajnikanth adopted Two elephants, Two camels & Two horses from the Zoo... Do you know why??? . . . . . . "To play chess!!" Rajnikanth saves a Tiger Eat Parle G, Do Not Eat Tiger! Only 1411 Left